Healing is a tricky process.
We have to fill in the gaps within us by certain means. But when we cling to the means - processes/people/places/environments which helped us along - we restrict healing.
We can become comfortable with the way we are relating to something or someone when the process inspires a feeling of certainty or security.
"When I speak with this person, I feel better. So I want to keep doing it, in the way I'm used to."
But as we become more dependent, so too does the need to be separated from the acts of dependency increase.
Our individuation and continued healing demands we be stripped of placeholders for personal power.
People, places, things can act as placeholders. We create a story, about how this has to be this way, or that must be that way, in order for us to feel "OK."
Yet, when we attempt to overrule the natural law of evolution - that which must continue to grow & evolve, must be allowed to grow and evolve - things become what we deem to be traumatic, wrong - "not ok."
The truth is, interlaced in our desire to call out what competes with/makes a mockery of our ideals regarding how we feel our experiences should, can or must be, is a force much greater than our want to maintain a certain hue of experience.
We are promised a response when we try to contort how our experiences unfold - particularly when we try to contort others.
Where we tug on the hemline of the past, we will meet the face of great liberating forces, which care not for our comfort - not one bit - yet offer the gift of breaking free from delusions, so we can truly evolve.
This is the gift of endings.